At first, I thought the exercise we did in class about our "family" was going to be easy. I scribbled down my brother and my parents, their brothers and sisters, and then their parents and thought I was finished. That was my family tree, and those excluded were not considered family.

Then, as I looked around the room, I realized that my family tree seemed incomplete. Others around me were still working on their diagrams and adding cousins, nephews and nieces, second cousins, and so on. That made me think about certain holidays and what my "family" does to celebrate them.

My original family tree was as simple as it gets, but once I began to think more about my "family" and who I consider family, names and faces started jumping around in my head like freshly popped popcorn.

I spend my Thanksgiving holiday with my mom and "her side" of the family. "Her side" of the family is not just her parents though, who really aren't even her blood parents. My mom was adopted by my grandmother, which sounds strange because she wouldn't technically be my grandmother. But, she is my grandmother and she accepted my mom as family, and when my mom started her family, my grandmother accepted us as family, too.

Sadly my grandmother, Mary "Mimia" Ross, passed away a couple of years ago after battling dementia. Her husband, George "Papa G" Ross, is still living, but has recently moved to Birmingham, AL to be closer to his immediate family. Papa G still makes it to Thanksgiving with the other members of my mom's side of the family.

The other members on my mom's side slipped my mind completely when I was first making my family tree, but once I thought about it more the fact became clear that these other people are my family as well. My mom's cousin's, Sharley, house is where we all gather for Thanksgiving. Immediately I had to add her.

Instantly, with some thought, my family tree exploded. Sharley is married to Larry Gates. Larry is the man, added to the list. Sharley's daughter, Jennifer, and her husband Jim Cusick regularly attend Thanksgiving and other of my "mom's sides" events. Jim and Jennifer's kids, Jake and Caroline, are in high school and regularly attend family functions as well. They are defiantly added to my tree.

Already, I have added an entire family to my original family tree, which made me think, Who else am I leaving out? My mind began to race, and I instantly thought of others that have been family to me, but have passed away. Apart from Mimia and my grandparents on my dad's side of the family, Sharley's mom, Anita Panos, leaves a memory of a sweet and loving older lady. She was encouraging but if you messed up she would not hesitate to tell you how it is.

After adding several other deceased members of my family to my tree, I began to think about people I consider family even though they are not my "blood family".

My older brother, Jesse, has had a significant other for quite some time now. She, Erica, attends family functions with him all the time. They go on trips together and are a smart match. She has, more recently, reached out to my brother's family, me included. She is an incredibly sweet and smart woman, and I gladly added her to my family tree.

This brought up another issue in my faulty, incomplete family tree. Should Erica's family be added to my family tree? My brother is quite close with her family just as she is with ours. I am sure they will get married eventually, which will bring their family into my family and vice versa. I have met and hung out with Erica's brothers, twins, on many occasions. They are not blood relatives like Erica is not, but that sense of family overwhelms me when I think about them. Added.

After thinking about my "family" for a little bit, I realized that it is a more complex and full tree. Blood relations do not matter to our family. Well, they do, but if you are not blood related, does not mean that you are not a member of our family. My mom's side of the family is not blood related at all, but they treat us and we treat them like family. Also, my brother's girlfriend and her family, even though not blood related and not married yet, I still consider them part of my family.